Michael Morena's Friends

it occurs to me more and more often that my best projects are the ones that start out as a clear vision. start, middle, end. where it's less like I'm wandering creatively and keeping what works, and more like I've got this singular whole my mind, and I'm telling you about it through whatever medium.

wait, not in my mind -- more like, I have a clear memory of something, something external and apart from myself, and I'm telling you its story.

"well, everything's wrong, and my patience was gone, when I woke one morning and remembered this so-o-o-ong."
- self-referential lyric, "here I go", syd barrett

I often refer to "freeing the statue from the marble", as in, you see the object inside the stone and you methodically chip away everything that isn't it. or, in this case, I see the update box of livejournal and I'm removing all the white pixels that are not my entry.

all too often, I create by having a vague idea of my destination, and rambling stepwise gradually until I somehow get there. but the results are never as good as the times I feel like I know a song and I'm just copying it down. or like I have a clear idea of where an essay is going to go, and what it needs to pass through to get there, before I write it.

or the times when I know exactly what I want a completed music piece to sound like before I start recording it. so when the result comes up, I can tell clearly if I got it right.

what's too often been going wrong with a handful of the album's songs is, I do some, listen, and then add some other stuff, then listen, then change something, then listen. I don't really know what the final result is going to sound like, and while that sometimes leads to pleasant surprises, it's also likely to come out a bit chaotic and uneven. vague. is this song about the guitar, the piano, the voices, or if it's a combination, what is each one saying? all the pieces need to fit into place in this fractalline way that communicates a shape.

it's an elegance that I strive for, but things always flow best when I don't push them too hard. when I have the complete idea in mind and just let it slide onto the platters.

"please leave us here, close our eyes 'til the octopus rise."
- misheard lyric, "octopus", syd barrett

this holds just as true with computer programming. if I know what all my variables, all my user interface objects, are likely to be ahead of time, it's a snap. all this upgrading and reverse-engineering is a nightmare, where all the pieces which used to hum together in a glorious octopus network start becoming disjointed, and disjointed stuff clutters and obfuscates until I realize that most of it is no longer necessary, or is just plain broken.

I even find myself looking at a building, or a meal, and asking myself, "sure it's fine, but where is this sandwich going? what is this typeface with this color on this kind of concrete for this kind of business really trying to say?"

bad examples I like (things that don't have a clear and elegant story to tell)
the latter seasons of Buffy,
most early episodes of Dead Like Me,
most progressive rock,
The Rocky Horror Picture Show (the movie itself),
most of the movie version of Hedwig,
Café Brasil's and Tandoor-A-India's labyrinthine add-on seating areas as their popularity grew,
The Empire Strikes Back,
the spiderhyphenman movies, and most movies like them,
The Goat,
myspace.

good examples I love (you can sum them up in a simple sentence)
seasons 2 and 3 of Buffy,
the best episodes of Dead Like Me and Battlestar Galactica for that matter,
Abbey Road side 2,
American Beauty,
livejournal,
Into the Woods,
the play version of Hedwig,
the Japanese Breakfast special at Rutt's (sole, rice, two eggs, orange juice, coffee, if memory serves).

good examples I dislike
Starbucks
most billion-dollar pop music
baseball

so that's my life's lesson at this time. my lesson for me. to let myself stand far enough back that the big picture becomes clear, and then to pursue that all the way down to the bits.

to veer away from obsessing on small but lovely pieces of what I want, and turn more toward stories. I want to tell a song, a program, an essay, create a show, decorate a room, like I'm relating a complete story that I already know and you should too.

so as you watch or hear the myriad pieces of it unfold, on some level you are, all the while, learning the singular story inside it.

So, after French Toast courtesy of

ebony_sphynx, I headed over to hang out w/

yourmuse (where I now am), who hands me THIS DVD which we're about to watch. Mind you, she had NOT seen my most recent LJ pic post. Hee!

Nice weather... I didn't wear "THE VEST" when I left the house.

No badge.

Oh, work doors are gonna be a pain today.

Also, no phone... it's in my vest.

IM only.

Long crappy day with drama at both places of work. Issues with my schedule at job #1, issues with "customer attentiveness" at job #2. The former is frustrating because my scheduling needs were made 100% clear before they hired me, the latter is cry-worthy because each issue arose from pure chance and shitty timing.

I want nothing more than to call in sick tomorrow so that I can de-stress and sew, but I can't because 1)I need the money; 2)It would only make things worse at work; and 3) I can't pull that shit off while living with my dad.

I need to sleep, but I got home at 11:30 and have a lot I need to do online. Oh woe is me.

At least I got tipped well tonight.

I'm selling my car. It's a 2006 Subaru Forester (blue). It's in excellent condition - we've hardly driven it in the past two years (16,000 miles). I'm doubting anyone is interested, but if you are it's priced at $17,000.

Been doing some reading tonight...

So, I'm curious:

Poll #1188661 Civics 101
Open to: All, results viewable to: All

View Answers

Hell yeah, and very aware of legislation that changes it.
3 (5.8%)

I've read it.
6 (11.5%)

I've skimmed it
14 (26.9%)

I think I might have learnt about it in High School
5 (9.6%)

No
22 (42.3%)

I thought the constitution was a US thing.
2 (3.8%)

View Answers

Often
12 (22.6%)

A few times
30 (56.6%)

Nah, it's not worth it.
3 (5.7%)

Never
8 (15.1%)

You can write to them?
0 (0.0%)

So, after a day of baking,

ebony_sphynx gets home and decides to...BAKE. She leaves me sitting on the stairs in the pool gazing up at the trees (including a redwood) moving in the breeze to forage further back in the yard for fresh mulberries (b'c the jacaranda's blooming so it's time to harvest mulberries). The hot fresh mulberry pie just came outta the oven...my mouth just came a little bit from the smell...

Okay, it just got very hot in here...pics later, if you're lucky... BOOOOTS!

So, latest call from michael was that the landlady is going to call ME tomorrow to ask some questions. Still no concrete answer, but her words to him were that we are being "strongly considered."

Is it bad that all my dreams since we saw the place have had at least a 5 minute scene take place there? It's too easy to visualize living in it. I tried really hard not to get my heart set on it but I am the queen of fail on that count.

I got a signed document from the office manager to verify employment dates for me and the Redhead(tm). That was fun. "Well, you started a week before me, and I started Oct. 31. So just pick a day that week and get on with it." So I decided on Oct 24, it sounded good. Signed and stamped... that, with my W-2 from last year and most recent pay stub (which will show my ytd) should be enough, right? I can't come up with 6 months of pay stubs, they're scattered all over the place and I get one every week... that's a LOT of papers. I hope what I have will work. Hope hope hope hope hope hope hope...

please, whatever I need to do, just make this work.

I almost punched chris in the face last night (michael told him "I think rebecca is going to kick you in the face" even). There he is, slurping food with so much noise I think I could have heard him behind a closed door... and his excuse is that he had his wisdom teeth out. So I said, subtly, "didn't they give you after-care instructions?" and he said "yeah, but I didn't see them until I'd already taken my painkillers." "yeah. do you have stitches?" "yeah." "yeah. You should read those instructions. I'm pretty sure it says you shouldn't suck on anything - no smoking, no drinking through straws, etc. And that slurping can't be good for you." so he proceeds to get even louder, and then went upstairs to smoke a bongload.

Joke will be on him when he fucks up his stitches and gets dry socket from the smoking.

TIME TO MOVE. NOW.

And that's good enough for me!

ebony_sphynx is treating me well...

Hotness now (it's hot out). Hotness later (dancing). Taking it a tad easy this afternoon, which works well.

Got in a car accident yesterday afternoon, as

mlerules posted for me last night. Guy cut across from being parked on Lyons avenue to trying to go in the left turn lane. So basically he was sideways in the street across both lanes. Nowhere to swerve around, not enough time to stop. i braked, but still slammed into him. All i could think as I hit the drivers side head on was "please dont let me kill this guy! Please no!" Turned out I hit the driver side passenger door mostly, and he was ok. I have a big bruise from the seatbelt, my neck and shoulder hurt like hell today. Not at work obviously. They said take tomorrow if I need it. i probably will. actually i'm pretty sure I will. Its last weekend of faire, so not doing parade!
Determined to go but take it easy. Very easy. Got a rental, going to lie down now.
Oh, I find it interesting when people ask I the air bags went off that they did not due to me messing with the fuse for it the day before. It was dark, and I didnt replace it right, so the light was on. I thought hmm. I should fix that fuse, its not in right. Oh well, when I get home. Um, Im glad i didnt get to it yet, I hear its much more painful with an airbag.
on vicodin, feeling a bit loopy.

I am thinking today is full of good omens:

my boss bought us all lunch (good lunch, even!)

I didn't have a scary amount of e-mail when I got in, but enough of it to know it's not a server problem.

I am spending the day copy-editing comic books. Comic books I ENJOY.

... yes. This all bodes well. I am pleased.

Got 238 arena points this week
I am at a total of 1377, out of a needed 1630.
Remainder to be earned is 253. Unless I can get the 5v5s going I don't THINK I can do that in 1 week. I have two week of calculations, so I should be safe, though.

Now I just need to decide on what weapon to be holding. My current sword is fairly... unmagey.

Of my list, I got half done. Hair is washed. Ambien was taking. Ring is new.
Garb needs washing. Instead of Portal, I watched HitMan. Pretty good job for a video game movie.

I wish I had legwarmers and fingerless gloves for tommorow. And bubblegum pink lipstick. Nah, make-up is too much.

Ambien is my friend, even if I get weird dreams. I slept through the pain! Yay!

Still would like new knees, thanks.

It's so nice sitting here, listening to Legend play and sing. Keep forgetting it's live and wondering why I don't have this on CD...

Earlier today, driving down from San Jose to Saugus, stopping off in Buellton for lunch w/Dear Friend Zil, I drove by Pismo Beach...sometime I may wanna go off on how Pismo Beach is much like Paris for me...for now though, today, I felt a slow spreading bittersweet as I drove through and looked out at the ocean and the pier and the dunes off in the distance...

I seem to have slotted folks into my schedule pretty consistently during this SoCal visit. Gonna balance fun, relaxation, hanging out, catching up, mellowing, partying, everything. Feeling good. Methinks the Vicodin's working on me by osmosis...

Urgent care visited, whole area covered by upper part of seat-belt is sore and might well bruise quite prettily, x-rays taken (nothing's broken), strong medicines procured, Sheriff report shows 'twas the other guy's fault totally. She's taking tomorrow off work to sleep and get a pedicure. Her phone's now on vibrate and sleep should happen soon. Glad I wandered into town just in time to help shuttle folks 'round, wait w/l'il T in waiting room, &c.